We all enter into a relationship hoping that the ones we are dating match our desires. For most women, the epitome of dating is having the relationship lead to marriage. However, tough to consume is the fact that we can barely tell what is in the mind of those we are dating. While some men are quite committed to a relationship hoping it gifts them with a wife, others are just out there enjoying the ride (read sexual intimacy) as long as it is available. Knowing how dedicated a guy is in a relationship might help you know whether you need the relationship still or not. While asking directly on the guy’s seriousness might have you receive a comforting answer nearly always, there is a need to be quite tactical in figuring it out. The following tips are key guidelines on how to ask a guy if he’s serious about you.
#1- Seek to Know if He is Looking for a Commitment
If you just started dating a guy and don’t know where it is all headed to, then this might be one way to know if he is serious. Usually, men fear the word ‘commitment’ especially when they are sure it’s a ‘hit and run’ kind of love or it’s a casual thing. Well, shoot up this question in the middle of a great eye to eye conversation, and be keen to watch his reaction.
Usually, some men might try to fake their response when asked this question over the phone. However, it’s nearly a game over for such men when this question is shot to their face when holding a one on one conversation. Avoid asking this question when you are about to gift the man with the ‘cookie jar’ since he might say anything to have you pleased just to have a moment with your precious gift!
#2- Question Where He Wishes to Be in Maybe Five, Seven, or Ten Years
The response you obtain about a man’s future can be a deal maker or deal-breaker for you and you should expect anything here. While some men might look serious in a relationship, they are not necessarily interested in marriage. They will do anything to make you happy but mention a lifetime commitment and he will walk fast past you the next time to meet at that coffee shop like a stranger.
With this question, women can be enlightened on two things. The first is whether the man has any prospects of marrying and the second, is whether the man has any plans to marry you. therefore, if he mentions neither a family life nor you in his plans for the future, then you ought to stay woke or even find a better partner. However, don’t rely solely on the answer you obtain here since some men wish that they obtain financial freedom before thinking about a family. So seek the help of another question in this list.
#3- Ask Him Tactically about the Status of His Friends
Well, this is one of the questions where we apply the rule of ‘means justify the ends!’ What company does your man keep? Show me your friends and I will show you your future is a factual mantra in this scenario. Unless he has quite some skills in balancing it quite nicely in a world where influence comes from those close to you, trust him not is his friends are die-hard single men.
That might sound quite strong to utter but look! Birds of the same feathers flock together and so will your man walk with men of similar traits. If not, such men might have an impact on how he reasons, acts, or treats you. Family men will seek the company of fellow company men and so will boys seek the company of fellow boys who discuss every lady who walks past them!
#4- Seek to Know His Perception on Long-term Commitments
Does your man believe that the world can have people fully commit truthfully to each other? Well, whatever response you obtain might be used to gauge how a guy sees your relationship at large. What the mind of a man visualizes, it actualizes.
Hence, if he sees long-term commitment as a possibility and the way to go, then your guy might be quite serious with you. However, if he says that long-term commitment is unachievable, then you’re dating a man who doesn’t believe in the power of marriage. After all, our beliefs and perceptions form the foundation of who we are.
#5- Focus to Know What is His Number One Priority in Life
Let’s be factual here! Whatever makes the number one focus for a man should in one way or another be making a foundation to a better life not only for him but you too. Ask a man about his number one priority in life and if it is the family, you are secure to date this person. Notably, a man whose priority is the family will in most cases channel all his energy towards ensuring that he has his woman and children happy hence promising some great life of commitment.
However, not all men might choose the family as the number one priority. Others make their career development a prime goal which means that they wish to seek financial freedom first. Well, this might be a serious guy since he cares about the future. On the other hand, a guy whose priority is material things and fun might show how unsettled he might be hence making him not a serious guy to consider.
#6- Ask Him Where He Sees the Two of You in Future
While this is quite a straightforward question to ask a guy, it will offer quite some reliable responses other than asking if a guy is serious about you. This question should be best asked when you have dated for quite some long while like say two years or so. The best-case scenario here is having a man admit that he has plans of marrying you.
However, if the man laughs off the question or rather tries to alter the subject then this might signify how insincere he might be in the relationship. With such a response you already know that the guy is not serious hence dating him any longer is quite a risk to your emotions.
#7- Seek to Know If the Guy is Happy with the Relationship
Happiness is probably the most coveted goal to achieve in life. For a relationship, happiness means that everything is all good and each party feels contented with how the relationship is at the given moment. With this question, you can easily tell if the man is ready for marriage or not.
If he tells you that something needs to be fixed, it means that the relationship is taking the right steps headed to the next level. Additionally, a man who sees everything to be flawless shows that he has accepted you for who you are since we all are faulty. However, a man who expresses no sense of appreciation or acknowledgment of the far the relationship has gone should have you think twice. Here there is less room for you to improve on who you are having the man find a simple way to escape the relationship by blaming you for all the mess.
#8- Question His Perception about Kids
Dating is just some toddler’s steps towards family life. After all, whatever happens in it is exactly what happens in a marriage, only that marriage has profound levels of commitments. You can expect kids at any time even when dating if you maintain an active sexual life.
Ask your man about his perception of kids and you will know if you have a future husband or you’re just dating a guy whose primary goal is a casual relationship. If he likes kids not, it shows you that the guy might not be serious about dating you owing to the ever-present probability of welcoming some kids every time you indulge in extreme physical intimacy.
#9- Ask Him What He Wants from Your Relationship
There is a chance that you will scare the guy away if you ask this question quite early. However, with more than six months of dating, you can comfortable ask this question and gauge the response offered on how serious the guy is with you. Notably, the answer offered here will inform you on whether the guy is seeking a fling with you or a relationship leading to marriage.
You might need to get prepared before asking this question to get an answer that might not please you. However, the risk is worth taking since you will know what position you hold in the man’s life. If the guy admits that he wants a relationship leading to marriage, then you are lucky!
#10- Seek to Know If He Feels on Track to Reach His Goals
You wish to have this guy settle with you and build a family. However, if there is unfinished business out there in terms of goals he wishes to achieve that he must accomplish before settling down, then this might be a red flag. Some guys might use this as an escape route from the relationship.
After all, you wouldn’t have a guy date you while he is in some few months to start a new degree in law school studying full time. Rarely will the guy give you the attention you need and deserve. Hence, this question helps you analyze the prospects of landing yourself a serious man.
When dating we can barely tell the direction of the relationship without seeking insight. However, with the above tactical tips, you can get to ask a guy indirectly if he is serious with you or not. Note that you need more than one of the above tips to be fully sure of what you decode from one question. Be ready to obtain any kind of response appreciating this as a reality check for the relationship.
What do you think?